


Illuminations

by Feisty_Documents



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Body Worship, Catra is in Love with Adora (She-Ra), Dirty Talk, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Light Dom/sub, Masturbation, Rough Kissing, Self-Denial, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:00:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26948620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Feisty_Documents/pseuds/Feisty_Documents
Summary: Disclaimer: This fic aligns with S1E11, "Promise" when Adora and Catra are trapped in the Crystal Castle together, reliving painful, shared memories of their time growing up together in the Horde. You know the one - it ripped your heart to a million pieces, remember? This fic explores an alternate ending that's a little more rousing, but still fraught with devastation (spoiler alert!).
Relationships: Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 67





	Illuminations

Adora shuffles down the sleek, iridescent hall of the Crystal Castle, slightly out of breath, and manoeuvering around the crumbled debris of the collapsed tunnel in which she now found herself. She'd very narrowly escaped the spider elementals that had just had her in hot pursuit. What had started out as a mission to find the elusive Light Hope, who would hopefully teach her how to use her powers, as She-Ra, to heal her friend Glimmer, soon turned to catastrophe. Catra, who'd snuck her way into the castle after Adora and triggered the security response, trails just slightly behind her, arms crossed and with a furrowed brow, looking like she'd rather be anywhere else on Etheria than trapped, alone, with her once-best friend.

Adora cannot believe how she came to find herself in this situation. Her mind races as she tries to decipher the reason for Catra being here. The last time they saw each other, Adora was just about to escape the Fright Zone with an ailing Glimmer under her arm, only to look back and see Catra pursuing her. She was slowly dragging tip of the stolen Sword of Protection along the metallic wall as she advanced, which sent sparks flying across her twisted, menacing face. She had never seen Catra look like that, not in all their time as friends growing up together in the Horde.

As a cadet in the Horde, any achievements of Catra's were constantly overlooked by their superiors, while Adora's were celebrated. Catra did, however, consistently fail to outperform Adora in simulated battle, and Shadow Weaver was always deriding her for refusing to live up to her potential. Adora had always wondered if these instances weighed heavily upon her friend's mind, but in those moments Catra would laugh off the criticisms as if they were beneath her, and take an unaffected air. And Adora had believed her. But when she saw the look in Catra's eyes in the Fright Zone that day, she thought, for the first time, despite the many times they'd met and fought on the battlefield, that Catra might actually try to kill her. This shook Adora to her core.

Imagine Adora's surprise, then, when Catra averted those eyes from her former friend's face, turned the hilt of the sword to her, and told her to take it and leave, thus enabling her to transform into the powerful She-Ra once more. She'd transformed immediately, but before she could turn and say anything to Catra, she'd disappeared. This behaviour was entirely puzzling to Adora, given that Catra was the one responsible for stealing Adora's sword and for kidnapping both Glimmer and Bow, thus requiring Adora to stage the rescue mission to the Fright Zone in the first place.

It just didn't add up, not after Catra had gone to such elaborate efforts at the Princess Prom, dressing in a full scarlet suit and even bringing a _date_ , to distract Adora while her cohorts planted bombs throughout Castle Evernight. This allowed them to cause a distraction where they could easily steal Adora's sword and capture her friends. It was, admittedly, a masterful ploy on Catra's part, and it was the first time Adora really saw the depth of her ex-friend's ambition and intelligence on display. Where was all this fire when Catra was put in constant competition with Adora as a child and young adult? Applying herself a bit more would have undoubtedly improved Catra's standing while living in the Fright Zone. Adora had never seen her care about something like this before, and it was unnerving that she chose Adora as the target for her newfound malice.

Still, by the time Adora realized that Catra had followed her inside the Crystal Castle to spy on her, enough time had passed that Catra could have easily attacked Adora while she was distracted, and would even have had the upper hand. And once the ancient First Ones' spider monsters started to attack, Catra had chosen to follow her, and they'd helped each other escape. It was as if their mutual hatred suddenly lost all its power when they were alone together, as if without the precipice of a battlefield between them, all the tension and pain between them evaporated, and they were their childhood selves again, unable to ignore their shared history and undeniable bond. These thoughts swirled in Adora's mind as she heard Catra padding along softly behind her, as she'd done so many times before. Until this moment, Adora didn't realize just how much she'd missed Catra. She was just close enough to her that she could pick out the faint scent of the generic bar soap they'd both used in the Fright Zone. It was...disorienting.

They soon came upon a room with a locked door.

"Ugh, another dead end," pans Catra.

"No, it's not," answers Adora, and she whispers the password she knew would get them through. "Eternia!"

The door retracts into the ground, and they cross the threshold together, soon finding themselves plunged into total and complete darkness. It isn't long before Adora stumbles, her boots slipping on the slick, crystalline floor. Catra, having been close behind her, trips over Adora, and they both fall to the floor with a loud crash that echoes throughout the hallowed chamber.

"Ow!" Catra says in a huff as she falls across Adora's splayed legs. "God, you're just as clumsy as ever. You're terrible at this princess thing, you know."

Adora scowls in Catra's general direction, and struggles in the darkness to free her trapped legs. "And what about you?" she said, roughly untangling one of her legs from Catra's. "Aren't cats supposed to be able to see better than humans in darkness? You're clearly a disgrace to your own species."

Catra gives a sharp hiss before shuffling into what Adora perceives to be a sitting position next to her. "Have fun. I'm going to find my own way out."

From the floor, Adora hears Catra stand and start to move towards the perimeter of the room, searching for an exit. With a start, Adora realizes that in the scuffle her sword had flown out of her hands, and begins feeling around for it in the area closest to her. Of course she loses the sword, and its ability to emanate a soft glow from the runestone in its hilt, right when she needs it the most. She sighs out loud, and hears her breath travel a long way, signalling the vastness of the chamber they now found themselves within. They weren't going to get out of here so easily.

After a few minutes, Catra returns with a huff to sit beside Adora again. "You really got us into it this time, princess."

"There you go, blaming me again when it's your fault for trespassing here and setting off the alarms!"

"Well, at the very least, I got to intercept your dumb do-gooder training," Catra drawls in her characteristic rasp.

Adora can't help it, she smiles despite herself at Catra's mockery, grateful for the cover of darkness. This candor of theirs was once part of her daily life, and its absence over the past few months suddenly weighs heavily upon her. Adora draws her knees to her chest and wraps her arms around them. "I've lost the sword again," she announces out loud. "I'm not much use to either of us if I can't be She-Ra."

Adora waits for Catra to make a quip about losing the sword again so soon after getting it back, but to her surprise, the jibe never comes. Catra is silent for a moment before saying "Oh, please. You were insufferably perfect before you ever became She-Ra, and you know it." Another pause. "At least to Shadow Weaver, or whatever."

Adora frowns and rests her chin on the top of her knees. "Shadow Weaver...I never once desired her approval. Not after the way she treated you. I'll never forgive her for that."

Catra scoffs. "That didn't stop you from accepting that promotion to Force Captain - you know, before you defected? She's made my life even more miserable since you left. No one can live up to your precious memory." Adora hears the malice start to slip back into Catra's voice.

"You know I never meant for that to happen," Adora trills. "I can't be held responsible for her behaviour! God, Catra, you were my best friend in the whole world, and now..." Adora surprises herself by choking back a sob that came seemingly from out of nowhere.

In her embarrassment at this newfound emotion, Adora attempts to stand and move away, but as she does, she feels something soft gently encircle her left wrist from out of the darkness. Catra's tail. Whether this touch is voluntary or involuntary, Adora isn't sure, but it's accompanied by Catra saying, in a small voice, "Did you really have to leave me like that?"

Adora feels a surge of warmth in her chest. "I told you, I couldn't go back to the Horde. Not after seeing the truth about what they do to innocent civilians. It's wrong, Catra. I don't want to be part of the reason for people getting hurt."

"But instead, you've hurt me. You don't seem to care much about that."

Adora balks at this, but before she can respond, Catra sighs and says, "It wasn't all bad, was it? Your memories of the Horde. We had some good times together, didn't we?"

"Of course we did," gushes Adora, shifting closer to Catra. "I miss you everyday."

"Even with your new friends, Sparkles and Arrow Boy?" Adora can tell she's saying this through a smile.

Adora chuckles softly at the monikers. "They're less annoying than you, but yes, even still. It's not so easy to forget a whole lifetime of memories, you know?"

Adora feels Catra move next to her and shift onto her side, propping her head up on one arm so Adora can feel her warm breath from beside her. "I know," she says. Her tail is still wrapped around Adora's wrist, and she can feel the tip of it thumping every few seconds against the back of her palm. Touched by this, Adora allows herself to slump down on her back and then turn to face her old friend-turned-enemy. She thinks to herself that it's probably unwise to allow herself to get this close to someone who, until very recently, had tried to hurt her on numerous occasions. And yet, lying and talking together casually like this in the darkness was so organic and familiar for the two of them, that she found her worries evaporating.

"This reminds me of all those nights we laid awake after lights out, waiting for everyone else to fall asleep so you could sneak into my bunk."

Catra lets out a small laugh from beside her. "I still can't believe we never got caught. My bunk was always perfectly made up from never sleeping in it, and everyone knew how terrible I was at keeping things tidy."

"That's for sure," Adora sighs. "It feels so weird to be sleeping alone now, without you there with me. I've been having a lot of trouble falling asleep in Bright Moon."

"Hmmph," says Catra, and Adora can't help but notice the note of pleasure in her voice. "No wonder you've been so easy to out-manoeuvre lately. You're basically a mess without me."

Adora scoffs and reaches out to lightly punch Catra's shoulder, but before she can retract her hand, Catra catches it in hers and holds it in place on her shoulder. Adora feels a jolt as the warmth from Catra's hand permeates her own. She can feel her face grow red and is again grateful for the cover of darkness. But she doesn't attempt to remove her hand.

They lie together like this for minutes, or maybe hours, feeling new intimacy bloom between their motionless bodies. Neither dares to speak and break the spell that has been cast between them, but Adora gradually registers Catra's breaths becoming quicker, and more shallow. They've moved their bodies so closely together that their foreheads are now touching. Adora risks a swallow, her heart racing, trying to decide if she should break the silence, but then she suddenly feels Catra shift upright a little and lean over her.

"You know, for someone who transforms into an eight-foot-tall, invincible warrior, you really are _such_ a coward."

Before Adora can register what's happening, Catra puts one hand softly behind Adora's head, slightly grazing her skull with her pointed nails as she does so, which sends shivers down Adora's spine. At the same moment, and in a contrasting sensation, Adora feels Catra's lips come down over her own, softly, but with an intensity that Adora could never have expected.

Adora gasps under the kiss, completely paralyzed by the surging of emotions that well up within her now -- none of which, she realizes with startling clarity, are fear or uncertainty or discomfort. It feels as though she is waking from a dream wherein she long slumbered, set apart from the waking world, before bursting through to a consciousness where she feels truly and wholly _alive_ , for the first time in her life. She feels the ripples of this emotional high roll through her, and despite the darkness, she sees colour explode and shift under her eyelids. The suffering, the strife, each painful decision she's ever made, including the one where she walked away from the person poised above her, existed for the sole purpose of bringing her here, to this moment with Catra, so she could feel the exquisite pleasure of being held in her arms, and kissed by her so feverishly, after being apart for so long.

Ah, so this is where Catra's fire lies. And it's kindling her own.

Catra slowly drags her mouth from Adora's in a moment's hesitation and moves away slightly, as if sensing Adora's shock. She feels as though Catra's about to speak, but beats her to it.

"I'm a coward, huh?"

With ignited vigour, Adora reaches up, grabbing Catra by her shirt's neckline and wrenching her back down towards her. With her other hand, she reaches up, fingering the edges of Catra's mask and then rips it from her face, and she can hear the clatter it makes as she hurls it, skittering, across the wide chamber.

"A-Adora!"

Before she can say anything else, Adora fists her hands in the soft hair that was previously obscured at Catra's temples, relishing in the feel of it, and using it as leverage as she draws Catra down, roughly, for another kiss. Their mouths are slightly mismatched this time in the darkness, but they soon find their way, opening to each other in a heated, breathless frenzy. Adora becomes aware of the rough edges of Catra's tongue as she explores her mouth. Catra's hold on the back of Adora's head tightens, and her claws wrap around Adora's ponytail, pulling it taut and bracing the back of her head against the hard floor, causing her face to arc upwards even more. Catra's mouth leaves her lips to place kisses along her jawline, and then dip further to kiss her way down her neck.

Adora allows an exasperated moan to escape her mouth, and puts one hand on her forehead as she breathes raggedly, feeling Catra begin to use her tongue on her neck, too.

"H-how did you know where to kiss me like that?" Adora pants. "The first time. It's pitch-black in here."

Catra pauses, shifts upright, and then swings her left leg over Adora's lap so that she is fully straddling her, like she'd done so many times when they would rough-house back in the Horde. But this time, the energy has changed, and Adora has no desire to be free of her predicament.

"...Maybe my eyesight _is_ better in the darkness than I let on." Catra drawls, and Adora swoons, imagining there's a devilish grin on her face.

"I hope I never find that goddamned sword," she replies, her voice husky, and she feels Catra's weight shift again as she leans down once more, pressing herself firmly against Adora's body as she slides up towards her face.

Catra's right hand settles in her hair again, yanking it free from her ponytail, and her left hand comes up to grip her jaw forcefully, but not painfully, causing Adora's breath to catch, to which Catra emits a sound, deep in her throat, sounding halfway between a growl and a purr.

How many touches had passed between them throughout their lives, first harmless and playful, then tactical, then offensive and with the intent to subdue the other? Adora has lost count of those instances, tusselling in the hallways of the Fright Zone as kids, sparring in simulations as cadets, gently nudging each other while sleeping in the same bunk...and then feeling Catra's claws rake painfully across her face, or dangling Catra off a cliff outside Princess Prom. They've likely touched each other thousands of times, but Adora knows these new touches are the ones that really cripple her, ones with remembered fear and tension mixing deliciously with awakening arousal.

Of course it's Catra. Of course. She is the only one that could ever elicit this reaction in her. Adora feels her jaw flex in Catra's tightening grasp and then allows herself to relax fully, absolutely helpless to her power. Catra seems to notice this yielding, and sighs forcefully in a way that's almost a sob, before stifling it with another smattering of kisses all along Adora's mouth, and moving her hands to cradle her face tenderly.

_My god. She really does want me._

This blatant affection shocks Adora and makes her even braver, as she moves her hands, which had settled on Catra's shoulders, slowly down the sides of her body, catching them on the belts slung across Catra's hips. Adora grasps them tightly and uses them to pull Catra even more firmly against her, desperate to feel the full weight of her body against her own.

Catra's tongue finds its way back into her mouth. She must have really liked that.

Taking cues from Catra's responses, Adora continues to run her hands all over Catra's body, mimicking the way Catra often would drag her claws down Adora's back. Now it's Catra's turn to gasp, and Adora wishes she could see her pretty eyes glaze over, and the look on her face as she comes alive at Adora's touch. Feeling robbed of this crucial intimacy, Adora notices a bubble of anger well up inside of her.

Stupid. So much wasted time. They've been fighting this, and each other, their whole lives, when it would have been so much easier, so much sweeter to give in. Why had they ever been apart? Adora feels fresh tears pool in her eyes. How long had they unknowingly pined for each other?

Adora then feels Catra's hands move to her sides, and begin to trail along the hem of her shirt. She is breathing heavily above her, and her body feels hot to the touch.

"Adora..."

" _Yes_."

Needing no other permission, Catra snakes her hands up Adora's shirt, and she feels the thrill of Catra's claws graze along a new part of her body. Adora sucks in a sharp breath as Catra's hands settle on her breasts, using her thumbs to peel back the cups of Adora's bra, and then brush against her nipples. Adora hasn't even touched herself like this, and is overwhelmed at how much it's turning her on.

"Oh, fuck..."

"You like that, princess?"

Adora whimpers and nods, knowing Catra can both hear and see what she's doing to her in the dark, her embarrassment now fully giving into her agitated arousal.

Catra's tongue is in her mouth again and Adora feels her moving one hand from her breasts and back down her body, as the other continues to graze her nipples. Adora soon feels a tug as Catra curls her claws around the waistband of her pants, and pauses.

Adora breaks their fevered kissing to say, breathless, "Do it!"

Catra plunges her hand down the front of Adora's pants and begins to palm her through her underwear, moving her fingers diligently, yet lightly, against her, having retracted her claws.

Adora moans again against Catra's mouth, as Catra continues to work her fingers against her. She soon thumbs the edge of Adora's underwear and pulls it aside, leaving Adora to revel in the feel of Catra's fingers sliding directly against her wet flesh.

"I fucking knew it," Catra whispers into her ear.

Adora shudders and feels herself pressing into Catra's fingers, her whole body aflame. She reaches her left hand up and into Catra's hair again, and places the other over Catra's breast, beginning to tease her through her shirt. Catra suddenly slows her fingers against her, and removes her other hand from Adora's breast to roughly grab Adora's hand from her own shirt, and slam it back down on the ground above Adora's head, causing her to gasp.

"Catra..."

"Not yet. I'm not done with you."

Adora lets a long breath escape her, as she feels Catra start to move her fingers against her again, this time excruciatingly slowly. Catra's releases Adora's hand and fists it in her hair again, pulling her closer so that their foreheads are touching once more.

"I want you to touch yourself."

"What?" Adora asks, incredulously.

"You heard me."

Adora nods against her, and brings her free hand down to raise her own shirt, exposing herself and feeling Catra's head turn down a little so she can see, Adora now knowing she can. Adora begins running her hand across her own breasts, finally touching herself in the way Catra had just touched her, and feeling Catra's eyes feasting on her, despite the darkness.

"Goddamn you."

Adora shudders again as Catra's fingers quicken their pace and her whispered insults, once so disarming, now threaten to push her over the edge. Heat begins to course throughout her entire body like an electric current.

"C-Catra, I'm-"

"Shhh. I want to hear it happen."

Adora chokes at these words, not believing her ears. She is coming undone at the hand of her best friend, and she can't believe how good it is. And she can do nothing to stop it.

Catra leans down to suck on and bite one of Adora's breasts, and then the other, slapping Adora's hand away in the process. Soon, Catra is gripping her face again where she kisses her once, deeply, then frees her mouth up to hear Adora moan. She presses their foreheads together again, her own breaths catching at hearing Adora's gasps and expletives.

"Adora. Adora. Adora..." says Catra in a strained voice.

Upon hearing Catra call her name like that, Adora finally lets go. She gives herself over to Catra fully and completely, shuddering and crying out in her arms and against her fingers. Catra lets her ride it out and then brings both her hands up to cup her face, and stifles Adora with more kisses. Adora feels something wet on her face and realizes that Catra is crying. Shocked at this, Adora kisses her back but decides to say nothing, completely spellbound by what just happened.

Gripping each other tightly like this, a flash of bright light suddenly cuts through the darkness and Adora feels her body begin to tense, the electric current she felt earlier now surging through her at an alarming rate. Her heart begins to race even faster than before and she breaks away from Catra, feeling ripples within herself that she cannot control. Adora knows this feeling all too well.

She's transforming. On her own, and without the sword.

Catra recoils, shuffling a few feet away from her, and uses one hand to half-shield her eyes, watching Adora transform into She-Ra as she'd seen her do so many times before. But this is different. Wrong, even.

The room is now bathed in a shimmering light that extends and touches upon the perimeters of the room, visible at last. Adora, still on her side but bracing her hands against the ground, finishes transforming and lifts her head, chancing a look at Catra. All is illuminated, and we look upon each other's faces for the first time in hours. To Adora's surprise, Catra's eyes are narrowed and her ears are back in alarm. The spell that was cast between them has broken.

"What the hell, Adora!"

Adora reaches one arm out towards her.

"Catra, I-"

But before she can finish her sentence, she hears a loud clattering of steel, and looks left to see the Sword of Protection skittering across the floor towards her, and then fly into her open hand. Seeing this, Catra jumps to her feet and takes a defensive stance, tears still running down her face, her claws coming out.

"I can't believe this! I should have known."

"No, Catra! It's not - "

"You've never fought this dirty before! Who even are you?"

"Would you just - "

"How could I have been so _stupid?_ That's your job!"

"Catra!"

"Well, you won't win this time. Thankfully you're still the slowest person on the planet."

And with this, Catra turns on her heels and speeds off in the opposite direction, advancing towards the outline of a door other than the one they came through. The colours dashed against the walls of the room begin to spin, as if part of a kaleidoscope, and Adora, as She-Ra, scrambles to her feet to run after her.

On the way, Adora watches as Catra lithely bends, without even losing her stride, to pick up her discarded mask, which she jams roughly onto her face before stopping at the door and turning back to look at Adora, her face burning with hatred.

"This won't be happening again. We won't speak of it. Ever!"

"That's not -"

"You and your Rebellion will pay for this."

After trying the door handle she must have first tried when they were in darkness, Catra screams and uses her nails to cut four deep gashes in the door, loosening it, which she then kicks in. It causes a great schism in the wall, into which she slips.

"Catra!" I choke back a sob at her retreating figure.

Once I catch up with the door, or the hole where the door once was, and having lost sight of Catra completely, I feel myself shrink back down to my ordinary size, the heat having completely left my body. The light centered upon me goes out and the room again grows dim, but the runestone in my recovered sword remains lit, and offers enough light to urge me forward. I begin to run, twisting and turning down numerous, identical, gleaming hallways, but there is no sign of Catra. She must have been able to find her way out without creating any more shortcuts for herself, as the rest of the castle seems to be intact. No other security responses seem to have been triggered, either; all is quiet in the castle, save for the reverberations of my own footsteps traversing dead space, and the sound of my still rapidly beating heart.

I choke back another sob as I reach the main entry and exit of the castle and lean against the doorframe, feeling the cold night air hit my face, and watching as the light in my sword's hilt goes out completely. I call out Catra's name once more, but she'll have been long gone by now, disappeared into the lush, sparkling treeline of the Whispering Woods. I look up into the dull, yellow face of the moon, the only light to guide me back to where I belong, far away from from the girl I now, decidedly, love, and just lost. I once again feel breathless.

I start my descent into the Whispering Woods, crying softly, and soon come upon the spot where I first laid eyes on the Sword of Protection, and first decided to leave Catra and the Horde behind. I remember the vivid sensation of awakening to its touch, and bitterly wish I'd never even found it. I remove the sword from my back slowly and bring it around to hold in front of my face. The face staring back at me in its reflection no longer feels familiar.

Full of despair, I fall to my knees and cast the sword aside, hearing a soft thud as it lands in the plush grass away from me, and allow the surrounding darkness to consume me once more.

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't the first time I've written fan fiction, but it's the first time in a long time, and it's the first time I'm posting anything. I hope you all like it! I love Catradora's relationship and thought it would be cool to explore a scene where they awaken to their feelings a lot sooner, and where you really get to see how deep Catra's love/obsession is for Adora, to her surprise. 
> 
> Please let me know what you think in the comments. :)  
> If anyone is an artist and wants to draw any of the scenes depicted here, I'd love to see it!


End file.
